I've been laying in bed awake since 4:45 with these words racing through my head and finally gave up just now (6 am) to come and get them out! ; ) This is mainly for my younger friends who are new to marriage and have just started or haven't yet gotten to "the hard part" yet.
Last night my Amazing Man and I were talking late into the night, like we do sometimes, and he came to a realization. That two of his favorite Men of God to seek advice from early in our marriage have since divorced their wives for completely ubsurdly unbiblical reasons. Robert enjoyed getting advice from these men because they gave him easy advice. Their advice left him feeling alright, because "heck, we all mess up" and didn't challenge him at all. And it got me thinking about seeking advice for the difficult marriage stuff. Rule of thumb, young married person. Anytime you are seeking advice on a difficult subject (a SIN subject) and you leave feeling better about yourself, it's probably bad advice. John 3:30 says that we must become less and God must become more. Your BEST Godly friends will keep directing you toward God and away from yourself. They will say, "Shut up and look up" when you don't want to hear it. Their advice will leave you uncomfortable and frustrated because the death of self, is hard and painful. These friends that give sound Biblical advice care more about the calling of God in your life then they do about your feelings. Because God is more important than you! Because one of God's goals for your life has never been comfort, but sanctification. And as iron sharpens iron (Proverbs 27:17) isn't comfortable or fun but necessary and God glorifying. If you are the iron, you are being beaten by your friend sometimes! Now, don't hear what I'm not saying (that is one of my favorite quotes from my dad, hee hee). You shouldn't be friends or seek advice from people that beat you over the head with the Bible or yell at you all the time. But with friends that tell you what you need to hear even when you don't want to hear it. "For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions," 2 Timothy 4:3 Truly Godly advice always points toward God. The only applause you should be getting is, "Hey, Sally! Great job dying to yourself and glorifying God!" That means denying yourself. That means serving your spouse when they aren't serving you. Why? Because you love God and your life isn't about you anymore, it's about HIM and HE said serve one another, love one another unconditionally. If you have a girlfriend that says, "He did WHAT, girl?! Yup! I wouldn't've cooked him dinner either!!" That is self glorifying and God denying. There can not be more of you AND more of God. It must be less of you, more of Him. Otherwise, it's more of you and less of Him. Our flesh MUST be beat down and suffocated so that we can move out of the way and point toward God. The only good in me is God. I don't want to have anything to do with myself apart from God. "Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." Matthew 16:24 That advice you're seeking from your friend, or that advice you're giving your friend? It should ALWAYS put God's calling before their feelings. Always.
1 Comment
Melissa
3/4/2012 08:49:52 pm
Yes! Such good advice. I wish I had this advice and knew early in my marriage what I now know. Thanks for sharing, Linds
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
LindseyI'm the mama and wife. Updating you on our life! Archives
January 2022
Categories
All
|