I can't believe it. I'm so blessed to know this little one! Each of our children teach us so much. Bryse is/was no exception to that! I must share the major things Bryse taught us during her tiniest stages!
My water broke at 6:30am on February 11th as I was getting ready for church. I quickly ate some food for preparation for the work of labor and called my doula. About an hour later my contractions started. We waited for a little bit and then went to the hospital, dropping Darby off at a friend's house on the way. Once there, we walked the halls until things got intense enough that I didn't want to walk anymore. Then I spent a couple of hours on a birthing ball with my doula and Robert taking turns pushing on my hips for me. Around noon the OB on call felt like I wasn't progressing quick enough and mentioned pitocin (I had been there for about three or four hours), we said no and about 40 minutes later I jumped a huge amount in my dialation and things started getting really intense. I chose to stay in bed from then on out and just vocalized through the contractions. My body started pushing about 20 minutes later and she was born 10 minutes after that! We did skin to skin immeadiatly and I loved it. She nursed immeadiatly which was shocking for me because Darby had had such issues with figuring that out. And so began Bryse's babyhood. When she was three weeks old I was learning very quickly what this "sleep deprivation" that everyone had talked about, but I never experienced with Darby. I was getting, on the average, about 3-4 hours of sleep and an emotional mess because of it! And ofcourse got mastitis, which i thought might just kill me. After three weeks of desperatly trying to treat Bryse like her sister was treated I realised that it wasn't going to work. Finally one night I threw in the flag of surrender and brought her into my bed and made sure she was nursing continually all night. The only time she woke (or I did) from then on was when she couldn't find me to nurse (or, as it were, pacify). And that first night I slept about seven hours and felt like I could run a marathon in the morning! Ha! During the days she screamed horribly whenever I put her down or stopped nursing her. My typical day looked like this: Me sitting on the couch, watching tv (or reading), and nursing. If ever I needed to go to the bathroom or take a shower, she screamed the entire time. I remember crying and thinking that she was just such an unhappy baby. But then I read Happiest Baby on the Block. And we totally adopted the term "fourth trimester" and the five "S's". Which helped immensly! And then I read some Dr. Sears and we developed the term "high needs baby". Once I stopped trying to force Bryse to be something she wasn't and just found a way to be content and even enjoy her the way she was, taking care of what MOST would call a "bad baby" or a "colicky baby" was easy! And rewarding! And so enters the era of babywearing!! Bryse taught me how to use a large amount of baby carriers. Not the mainstream ones, but the ones that would allow me to nurse her continually while I grocery shopped or cooked dinner or took care of her sister. Typically she would scream in her carseat until we got to our destination. I would pop her into the mei tai, get her nursing and then run my errand! : ) Robert and I also got closer through the first few months of Bryse's life. While I didn't experience much help with Darby, Robert made up for it with Bryse! He saw the need and filled it without me even saying anything and it was HUGE in our marriage! He did housework, grocery shopping, errand running, and dinner cooking all while I just sat nursing. And we both learned that there are seasons when God calls us to just sit and take care of what seems like nothing special, but really is. I learned to be still and not feel useless and Robert learned how to care for us in ways that he never had. And I called him my super hero. Bryse moved out of the needy stage all on her own, slowly weaning herself from needing to nurse all night and all through the day with little help from me. By 3-4 months old her crying got less and by six months old she was as happy as a clam! I could hardly believe she was the same baby and it just reinforced my belief that it wasn't a matter of her being a sad baby but more of a baby that needed more help in transitioning into this big world. (as a side note: PLEASE don't ask new mothers "Is he/she a good baby?" It is so rude and horrible sounding and it must stop. Just because Bryse cried alot does not mean she was a bad baby.) Since then she has been a little comedian! She has been such a fire cracker and I'm so thankful for her and for those first few months when she taught our family soooo much!
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